What is a Cuddle Party?
This whole Cuddle Party thingy sounds weird. Is it?
Why would anyone want to cuddle with a bunch of strangers?

This is really just an excuse to have an orgy, right?
Do PJs really stay on the whole time?
Do I arrive in my pajamas, or can I change there?
What if something "comes up"? (AKA, Arousal and the Erection Phenomenon...)

How on Earth are the limits enforced?
Cuddle Lifeguard On Duty? What's that?
What's the job of the Cuddle Caddy?

Will there be a bunch of pajama-wearing weirdos at the party?  Who comes to Cuddle Parties?
Do I have to cuddle everybody at the party?  What if I don’t want to cuddle with anyone?
I only want to cuddle with hot people. How can I make sure that happens?
Is it a bad thing that I only want to cuddle the people to whom I'm attracted?
What do I do if no one wants to cuddle me?

Are Cuddle Parties therapy?
Is this a singles event?
Are the parties gender balanced? Why?
Will there be other people my age at your party?

Do you allow people to come to parties if their partners don't know about it?
I’m in a great relationship. Why should I come to a Cuddle Party?

Why all the emphasis on having to arrive on time? It doesn't sound very relaxing.
Welcome Circle? Sounds New Age-y... This isn't some 60's encounter group thing is it?

What's the ideal size for a Cuddle Party?
How long does a Cuddle Party last?
Why are Cuddle Parties usually nonalcoholic events?
Can I get stoned at a Cuddle Party?

Can I become a Cuddle Party Lifeguard and throw my own Cuddle Parties?
What the heck is a Puppy Pile?

What is the cost to attend a Cuddle Party, and why isn’t it free?
What if I come and I’m not happy?
What’s the deal on the Wait list?

I don’t live in Orange County. Can I still come to one of your parties?
I live in [fill in]. Are there any parties closer to me?

So what really happens at a Cuddle Party? <wink, wink> Will I get lucky?
What about the Cuddle Party on “CSI:New York?” Was it realistic?
But I want sex ...
If I pretend I’m not after sex, does that make it ok?

I’m a reporter.  Can I come to a Cuddle Party?
Will there be reporters at the party?  That worries me.
Do you offer private parties?  Our group is interested.


What is a Cuddle Party?

It is an event for adults to get together and explore affectionate touch and communication without it becoming sexualized. At these events, we create the safe space to talk about and explore what our needs are as adults when it comes to affection, intimacy and welcomed touch. In other words, CUDDLING!

For a more thorough explanation, check out this article by Reid Mihalko, the founder of Cuddle Party.

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This whole Cuddle Party thingy sounds weird. Is it?

Not really. While coming together for an event such as this might seem a little odd, our need for contact, touch, and affection is proven. Affectionate touch is necessary for healthy immune systems, good mental health, and the development of our brains and nervous systems. It can reduce stress levels and promote healing in sick or injured people. Touch is a means of communication with the people around us. Practicing welcomed, affectionate touch without sexualizing it can improve relationships of all kinds. Touch is one of the five senses, and as such, it is one of the ways we learn about the world. It feeds and nurtures us.

So why do we think that past a certain age we as human beings no longer need to be touched -- unless it's sexual or your doctor is giving you a physical?

This is the real weirdness: past the age of twelve or so, we're supposed to curtail our physical contact with other adults. As adults we STILL NEED TO BE HELD! Held, hugged, touched, stroked, caressed, piled atop on, reclined across, nuzzled, and affectionately massaged. Cuddle Parties are a place to begin exploring and reclaiming the sense of affectionate touch and play we naturally displayed and enjoyed as children, and that we need to be happy, healthy adults.

This is a touching story about the desire of an American soldier in Iraq for cuddling, written by Reid Mihalko, the founder of Cuddle Party.

The two founders of Cuddle Party have written a pair of companion articles talking about the type of people they have seen coming to their parties. “Men Are Bastards” is Marcia’s perspective, and “Real Men Do Cuddle” provides REiD’s perspective.

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Why would anyone want to cuddle with a bunch of strangers?

It's different for everybody. Many first-time cuddlers start off thinking they don't want to cuddle with strangers at all, but there are other types of touch that might be welcome (like a foot or shoulder rub), and they are surprised to learn during the Welcome Circle that others may have shown up with nearly identical feelings. Later this commonality may provide a basis for a conversation, to “compare notes” as it were, and then something magical often happens. Once we've taken the first step in getting to know one another, it's surprisingly easy to want to reach out and connect with them on a physical level with a touch of the arm, or ask for a hug. And by the end of the evening those who arrived most skeptical often find themselves completely enjoying cuddling with new friends they hadn’t known before the party.

For some, attending a Cuddle Party is a good way to meet new and interesting people and to take a look at the state of touch, affection and intimacy in today's world. For others, it's a means of exploring their touch and communication boundaries. For still others, it's a safe way to get some good, clean affection.

At the same time, it’s important to stress Cuddle Party Rule 3b: “You don’t have to cuddle anyone at a Cuddle Party, ever. To cuddle or not is always your choice, and you are encouraged to say no if you do not want to do something.

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This is really just an excuse to have an orgy, right?

Short answer: No. A Cuddle Party is a non-sexual event.

Sorry folks, no sex!

For the long answer, here is an article by Reid Mihalko, the founder of Cuddle Party.

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Do PJs really stay on the whole time?

Yep.

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Do I arrive in my pajamas, or can I change there?

While we think the world might be a better place if we all drove around in our PJs, we do have space for you to change when you get here.

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What if something "comes up"? (AKA, Arousal and the Erection Phenomenon...)

Erections. Erections. ERECTIONS. There, we said it.

When men get aroused, they sometimes get erections. Arousal is an inherent part of being human. But somehow, somewhere, many of us began to believe that we must act on this arousal whenever it showed up, as if we may never have another chance to be horny again and we must strike while the iron is hot, so to speak.

Well, this attitude has caused all sorts of weirdness in our society and massive miscommunications between the sexes.

Since Cuddle Parties are safe spaces for adults to explore and practice affectionate touch without sexualizing it, and since the state of arousal is natural for us human beings, it's no surprise that erections sometimes do occur. Our goal is not to teach men how not to get erections. Instead, we want to make normal functions and needs of human beings seem, well, "normal."

We strive not only to free people of the awkwardness surrounding arousal, but to allow them to develop some real coordination around it. At a Cuddle Party, erections become Mother Nature's way of giving us the thumbs-up sign. Nothing's wrong. Nothing's dirty. Nothing's suspect. And as long as you're not dry-
humping anyone (Rule #7), it's completely okay. Really !

And now, with all of that said, the reality is that arousal isn’t as common at Cuddle Parties as some might expect before their first party, probably because the focus IS on creating a safe, non-sexual space. Still, arousal certainly can and does happen from time to time. Our job is to create a context in which that’s just not such a big deal.

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How on Earth are the limits enforced?

It's easy. Everyone follows the Cuddle Rules.  That means you won't be alone in upholding the Cuddle regulations.  We'll go over the rules during the Welcome Circle and answer any questions that come up. And you’ll know all of the other Cuddle Party participants are on the same page as you (see Why all the emphasis on having to arrive on time?). Plus, the Cuddle Party Lifeguard On Duty and the Cuddle Caddy are there to ensure that the safe-space policies of Cuddle Party are honored.

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Cuddle Lifeguard On Duty? What's that?

Cuddle Lifeguards are a group of individuals who have been specially trained and certified in how to facilitate Cuddle Parties. They are responsible for ensuring the integrity of the room, meaning that no sex happens, that everyone feels safe and IS safe, and that if any sexual energy shows up, it is dispersed safely and quickly. The Cuddle Lifeguard, along with the Cuddle Caddy, facilitate the Welcome Circle and make sure everyone gets taken care of.

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What's the job of the Cuddle Caddy?

Cuddle Caddies assist the Cuddle Lifeguards. Their job is to help out, by checking people in, answering questions backing up the Lifeguard and providing a second set of eyes looking for potential problems. Think of Cuddle Caddies as the flannel sidekicks of the Cuddle Party Dynamic Duo.

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Will there be a bunch of pajama-wearing weirdos at the party?  Who comes to Cuddle Parties?

People from all walks of life, all age groups, all backgrounds and all income levels attend Cuddle Parties: lawyers, financial analysts, engineers, yoga instructors, moms, dads, system administrators, artists, students, psychoanalysts, Republicans and Democrats, grandparents, nurses, hippies, entrepreneurs, contractors, musicians... Well, you get the picture.

The two founders of Cuddle Party have written a pair of companion articles talking about the type of people they have seen coming to their parties. “Men Are Bastards” is Marcia’s perspective, and “Real Men Do Cuddle” provides REiD’s perspective.

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Do I have to cuddle everybody at the party?  What if I don’t want to cuddle with anyone?

You don't have to cuddle anyone at a Cuddle Party, ever. (That’s Cuddle Party Rule 3b.) You can attend the whole event and not cuddle a single person. Really. And, yes, that’s happened. For some people just being in a room filled with strangers in pajamas is a breakthrough. We don't believe in forced cuddling, and you are free to cuddle (or not) with anyone you want, provided that you get a verbal Yes.

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I only want to cuddle with hot people. How can I make sure that happens?

Turn off the air conditioner... Oh, wait. Never mind.

If you only want to cuddle with "hot people" we suggest that you only invite and make requests for cuddling to/ from those individuals whom register on your Hottie Radar. It's perfectly okay to only want to cuddle with those you find attractive. Of course, check in with yourself to make sure that you're okay with receiving a No before extending invites and making requests.

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Is it a bad thing that I only want to cuddle the people to whom I'm attracted?

Absolutely not. Why do anything you don’t want to do when saying “no” is an option and it’s encouraged (see Rule #4). In other words, why do something you find unappealing when you truly have a choice? There's nothing wrong with wanting to cuddle people you're attracted to. In fact, we encourage that you cuddle only the people to whom you're attracted.

Now what "attracted" means to you may have a much wider range than you think it does when you're in a safe space, and we invite you to explore that at your own pace.

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What do I do if no one wants to cuddle me?

This question comes up A LOT, so you're not alone if you have this concern.

Basically, this question is all about Rejection. That's Rejection with a capital "R", the kind of rejection that deeply scarred us sometime around 7th grade when we had to walk all the way back across the gymnasium after everyone heard us get a “No” to "Would you like to dance?" That rejection was proof positive that we were unliked and unwanted, and a loser. And it still means that today, right?

Well, actually, now that you asked, rejection isn't proof of anything other than someone saying no. It could mean a million different things than what you're spinning in your 7th grader mind right now. And a no today doesn't necessarily mean a no next week or even an hour from now (and a yes today doesn't mean an automatic yes next week either for that matter). So stop pummeling yourself already, ok? Let's give that brain a rest.

Cuddle Parties have a significant workshop element, and they are designed to be a safe space to explore communication and experiment with making requests and extending invitations. As such, a lot of thought has been put into the element of rejection that can come with negative responses, and the Welcome Circle is structured to make Cuddle Parties a safe place to also experience and explore
rejection.

"A safe space to experience and explore rejection?" Are you thinking that sounds like crazy talk?

Well, it is to most of us. Most people have absolutely no coordination with handling rejection in an adult way, and by adult I mean any better way of handling rejection than just thinking, "My life is over if they say No, so I'm not even going to ask!"  We're all stuck in our awkward 7th grader phase when it comes to anyone saying No to us. That's the bad news. The good news is that we don't have to remain tripping over ourselves, voices cracking when it comes to worrying about rejection.

A Cuddle Party becomes a safe space to explore and push through the worries concerning "What if no one wants to cuddle me?" when we realize the rest of the room shares the exact same insecurity. Go ahead, ask them - Yes, even the pretty people. Nearly all of us have the worry that no one will pick us. That's all of us, even if it's just for a fleeting second. Insecurity is completely normal. The only difference between anyone at a Cuddle Party is that with some of us, that fleeting second of a thought draaaaaags on for hours. Or at least seems like it does. With a little courage, some practice and a smidgen of safe space you'll be amazed how quickly you can leave such insecurities behind and jump across that chasm of fear to see what it's like on the other side where the next concern becomes "What if someone WANTS to cuddle me?"

Try that problem on for size!

And if you’re still wondering whether or not you’re going to get any cuddling at a Cuddle Party, I’ve personally never seen anyone at a Cuddle Party who wanted to cuddle and didn’t, and the number of “yes” responses to cuddle-requests always seems to greatly outnumber the “no’s.”

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Are Cuddle Parties therapy?

Cuddle Parties are intended for people who are well. People who need professional care should consult trained health care providers. Cuddle Parties are not intended as substitutes for therapy. If you're someone who is currently in therapy or seeing a mental health care professional, we recommend that you consult your doctor(s) and talk to them about attending a Cuddle Party before you do so. We'd also appreciate it if you gave us a heads up on your situation too. Any such disclosures will be held in strict confidence, but we reserve the right to ask you not to attend a Cuddle Party if we believe this may create a situation that is unsafe for you or for any other guests.

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Is this a singles event?

Cuddle Parties are open to everyone, regardless of relationship status. Singles in particular seem to flock to Cuddle Parties, because they are a safe, fun, and non-alcoholic way to meet other people, but we frequently have couples attend as well. If you have a partner, but are attending alone, we encourage you to discuss things with your partner beforehand.

One of the founders of Cuddle Parties offered this perspective on Cuddle Parties as a singles event.

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Are the parties gender balanced? Why?

Unless a party is specifically designated otherwise in advance, we strive to keep things as 50/50, boy/girl as we can, but last-minute cancellations and other factors can impact our careful planning. Actual experience says a few more or a few less y-chromosomes here and there doesn't hurt.  Please also see “What’s the deal on the Wait-list?

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Will there be other people my age at your party?

While we often see wide age differences between people cuddling at our parties, we also see a lot more initial comfort when people can look around and see other potential cuddlers of their own age.  Almost no one wants to be 30 years older or younger than everyone else in the room.  And so, we ask the age of the people coming to our parties, and try hard to be sure that there is gender- AND age-balancing.   Please also see “What’s the deal on the Wait-list?” 

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Do you allow people to come to parties if their partners don't know about it?

If you're in a relationship, we strongly recommend that you talk to your significant other(s) regarding  Cuddle Parties BEFORE you attend and agree on your rules and boundaries beforehand. Sneaking out for an illicit spooning is very un-cuddly! Regardless of whether your partner is present at the event or not, we don't want you breaking any relationship agreements.

A good rule of thumb is this: if you think you’re getting away with something, then you need to have a
talk. We recommend lots of full disclosure as soon as possible, which includes going over the Cuddle Rules, discussing why you want to attend and creating boundaries which make one another feel safe. Please honor your relationship before you jump into your PJs and head off to the nearest Cuddle Party.

After the Cuddle Lines have been drawn, stick to your agreements for the whole party and adjust your agreements afterwards if necessary for the next party.  Trust us on this -- trying to re-negotiate boundaries during an event usually doesn’t work out very well.

If this seems completely out of the question to you and you think we're absolutely out of our minds, we recommend that you consider hiring a professional for some personal relationship coaching.

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I’m in a great relationship. Why should I come to a Cuddle Party?

Cuddle Parties are a workshop for developing communication and boundary-setting skills in a safe environment.  Many couples have attended Cuddle Parties and cuddled only with their partners, and still talked of the experience in very positive terms.  Rule 3b says you never have to cuddle with anyone at a Cuddle Party, but we strongly recommend you at least spend at least some time snuggling with your honey, whether or not you want to cuddle with anyone else.

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Why all the emphasis on having to arrive on time? It doesn't sound very relaxing.

The reason we make such a big deal out of arriving on time is because the essential ingredient in creating Safe Space at a Cuddle Party involves having everyone at the Welcome Circle. Arriving on time might be stressful for some folks, so plan accordingly. Arrive early enough such that you've got time to find our location, get parked, change into your pajamas, sign in, go to the bathroom if you need to, and settle in before we kick off the event.

We create safe space with the rules, and it’s critical that everyone know that everyone else has heard and understands the explanation that goes with those rules.  Unfortunately, we can not admit anyone to a party who isn’t present at the beginning of this discussion, even those who have been to dozens of other parties.  Sorry, but there will be no exceptions.

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Welcome Circle? Sounds New Age-y... This isn't some 60's encounter group thing is it?

An encounter group might be a familiar term for those who experienced the 60's, but "Welcome Circle" was the best term we could come up with because, well, everyone sits more or less in a circle and that’s when we welcome you.

Aside from that, the Welcome Circle is how the whole "Safe Space" thing gets created, and everyone's led through a few outrageously silly and powerful exercises that begin to break down the weirdness we have ingrained in us concerning touch, and affection, and communication (or lack thereof).

The Welcome Circle is also the space where people are encouraged, if they want, to introduce themselves and share why they came to the Cuddle Party in the first place. This is when people begin to realize that the stranger sitting across from them in their PJ's isn't so strange after all.

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What's the ideal size for a Cuddle Party?

Somewhere between 10 and 20 people seems to be a good number because it's just enough people to be able to connect with during the three and a half hours a Cuddle Party lasts. But there's no hard and fast rule on size since we've had powerful cuddle experiences happen with as little as six people present, and there were 26 guests present at our second party, with no loss of the warm fuzzies.

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How long does a Cuddle Party last?

Usually they last about three and a half hours, although the length may vary a bit, especially for special events.

Overnight parties would be inconsistent with the goals and structure of a Cuddle Party.

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Why are Cuddle Parties usually nonalcoholic events?

Great question. When Cuddle Parties began, REiD and Marcia actually recommended that people bring some champagne so they could make mimosas if they wanted to. What was discovered was that people brought champagne but no one drank it. Go figure!

Eventually the whole alcohol idea was nixed because the cuddling experience was so powerful and people were feeling so safe that they just didn't need it. Now, some folks who hire us to create Private Cuddle Events or Cuddle Birthday Parties may wish to include alcohol in the evening's celebration itinerary, but we always create Cuddle Parties with the intention that the people who attend feel safe and remain present to their experience. Cuddle Parties and other affectionate play events are places to get in touch, not to check out. Getting drunk is not good cuddle manners and it's not what we're committed to.

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Can I get stoned at a Cuddle Party?

Illegal drug use of any kind at a Cuddle Party is not cuddly. Cuddle Parties are safe spaces for adults to explore affectionate touch without sexualizing it, and without drug use.

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Can I become a Cuddle Party Lifeguard and throw my own Cuddle Parties?

REiD and Marcia continue to offer the same Cuddle Party Lifeguard Training Program that I took prior to certification. If you think you’d like to become an official, certified Cuddle Party facilitator, you can get more information at www.cuddleparty.com.

These are some thoughts at the first anniversary of Cuddle Parties, written by Reid Mihalko, the founder of Cuddle Party. They touch on his objectives for the training, and why it isn’t a slam dunk.

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What the heck is a Puppy Pile?

A Puppy Pile is when a bunch of people crawl atop one another and cozy up, like puppies do just before they fall asleep. Some of us recall similar moments as children piled on top of one another in front of the TV or scrambling for a King of the Mountain moment on a bunk bed with our friends and cousins.

Think of a rugby scrum but with everyone in pajamas, and no one biting anyone's ear.

Puppy piles take place at the end of some, but not all parties hosted by Orange County Cuddle Parties..

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What is the cost to attend a Cuddle Party, and why isn’t it free?

There are several facilitators throughout the country, each with their own cost and pricing structure. For example, REiD and Marcia charge a flat $30 per person for their parties in New York. Some facilitators start at $30, but discount for seniors, students or couples. Some accept donations in lieu of a fixed fee.

Many facilitators must rent yoga-studio space, which can be a significant cost.  I am fortunate to live in an apartment large enough to easily accommodate as many as 20 guests, and so I have been able to avoid that cost.

At the same time, I do have expenses for food and misc. supplies.  The blankets, pillows and wall-to-wall foam flooring were purchased specifically to enhance the Cuddle Party experience, and the training and license fees for Atlas Spooned (the parent company for cuddleparty.com) were quite significant. It would be nice to fully recover those investments at some point. Beyond that, a portion of the receipts are shared with the Cuddle Caddy, without whom the parties would not be successful.

While the parties last a little over three hours, a much greater amount of time is required to manage the reservations, along with this web site, and it takes a lot of time to set up a party and clean up after.

The parties hosted by Orange County Cuddle Parties are currently offered on a voluntary-donation basis, where guests are asked to contribute in accordance with the value they feel they received, and in accordance with their earning abilities if on a fixed income.  A good comparative reference would be the amount that might be spent during a 3-hour date or on a different workshop. 

Looking for a suggestion?  Anything is appreciated, with $15 to $50 being the typical range of donations. 

At the end of the evening, if you feel you received no value, then please give nothing.

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What if I come and I’m not happy?

Please tell us if that was the case. Our desire is that everyone leave feeling they had a good time and wanting to return.  Your feedback, positive or negative, helps.

You are free to leave at any time during a party, though as a courtesy to the other guests, we hope you will remain until the Welcome Circle is completed and the first exercise has begun.

Obviously, you are under no obligation financially if you didn’t feel you received anything of value.

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What’s the deal on the Wait list?

For a variety of reasons, we normally try to achieve gender-balancing, especially on smaller parties.  At the same time we typically have far more men responding to our advertising than women, and the result is that single men who say they want to attend a party are almost always put on a wait-list. Confirmations come for the men, once we can be certain of the number of women who will be attending.

Knowing that most guests don’t want to be 30 years older or younger than anyone else at the party, we try to be sure there are a number of people in an age range before we confirm reservations, which means a single woman can sometimes be put on the wait list.

The easiest way to bypass the whole wait list thing is to bring a date.

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I don’t live in Orange County. Can I still come to one of your parties?

Do you have a fake ID?

Seriously, our parties are open to everyone, regardless of where you live (subject to gender- and
age-balancing considerations). While there are other facilitators in the LA area, our location in Anaheim is probably closest if you live in Riverside or San Diego Counties, or in the southeast part of LA county (Long Beach, Downey, Whittier, Hacienda Heights, etc.)

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I live in [fill in]. Are there any parties closer to me?

If you are on the Westside in LA or in the Valley, please check www.cuddlela.com. The current list of certified facilitators, along with their scheduled parties, can be found at:
http://www.cuddleparty.com/calendar/

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So what really happens at a Cuddle Party? <wink, wink> Will I get lucky?

The focus for Cuddle Parties is creating a space that is safe, where people can enjoy non-sexual touch.

If you are looking to meet someone with whom you may be able to develop a relationship, Cuddle Parties can be outstanding. You may find someone you meet at a Cuddle Party to be more interesting and have more depth than the people you often find in singles’ bars, and conversation will be a lot easier without having to yell over a band.

On the other hand, if your goal is to laid, you are probably looking in the wrong place. Here is an article by Reid Mihalko, the founder of Cuddle Party that talks about sex and Cuddle Parties.

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What about the Cuddle Party on “CSI:New York?” Was it realistic?

<sigh> No. The similarities pretty much stopped at the name.

The episode of “CSI:New York” that first aired October 6th, 2005 (“Grand Murder at Central Station”), included a scene identified as a “Cuddle Party.”  If you watched and found it frightening or distasteful, rest assured, the depiction was about as similar to a real Cuddle Party as it was to a typical birthday party. 

Or if you thought, “That’s for me,” sorry, you will be very disappointed.  It might have made for interesting TV, but it sure didn’t accurately portray a Cuddle Party:

    - For starters, you won’t find women dressed in lingerie or guys without shirts at Cuddle Parties. Here’s the dress code, and Cuddle Party Rule #1 (“Pajamas stay on the whole time”) applies.  The pictures on this web site (and all of the other Cuddle Party web sites) are representative of what is worn..

    - The typical Cuddle Party guest doesn’t look like a stunningly beautiful or handsome 30-year-old TV star. Sorry, just regular folks.

    - People definitely talk during parties. In fact, Cuddle Party Rule #3a require that (“... you must ask permission and receive a verbal YES before you touch anyone”).

    - People don’t simply walk into the middle of the parties uninvited. The door’s closed.

    - Still, the worst fabrication was the near-orgy activities in which the actors were participating.  Rule #2 (“No Sex”) and #7 (“No Dry Humping”) would have been enforced long before things got as steamy as what was shown.

If you’re starting to wonder if they got anything right, well, there really was a story in TimeOut New York about Cuddle Parties, but the list gets very short after that.

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But I want sex ...

Try a singles’ bar or club.  A Cuddle Party is probably the opposite of what you are looking for. 

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If I pretend I’m not after sex, does that make it ok?

Perhaps your thoughts are actually very innocent, and your real question is, “How do you define ‘Sex’ in terms of Cuddle Parties?”

Ok, if that’s the case, this is the answer, as written by Reid Mihalko, the founder of Cuddle Party.

On the other hand, maybe you really do want to know how much you’ll be able to get away with, in which case the answer is, “not much at all.” Cuddle Parties are all about creating a space for affectionate touch that is truly safe and non-sexual, and “pretending” you’re not trying to touch someone inappropriately doesn’t suddenly make your actions either safe or non-sexual.  Actually, just the opposite, and your motives will probably be clear to all. If these are your real interests, you will likely find a Cuddle Party does a poor job of meeting your needs.  Please refer to the previous question for your best options.

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I’m a reporter.  Can I come to a Cuddle Party?

Yes, of course.  Any time (subject to gender- and age-balancing), as long as it’s not in the capacity of a reporter.

As a reporter? Yes, but ...

The safety of our guests is paramount, and we are absolutely committed to Rule #11 (“Please be respectful of other people's privacy when sharing with the outside world about Cuddle Parties.”). At the same time, we want to help spread the word about Cuddle Parties and love publicity. While we’re willing to take our chances about what you might write about us (like we have any choice in the matter), we are much more protective of our guests and their right to privacy.

Which means there are two ways you can cover one of our parties. The best is for us to plan a press-friendly party in advance and advertise it as such.  That way everyone attending will be doing so with an understanding that reporters and/or photographers will be present, and usually there are very few privacy concerns.

Attending a party on a last-minute basis is also possible if there isn’t time to let the guests know in advance, but the continued presence of reporters would only be possible with the unanimous consent of all guests, after a discussion and vote during the Welcome Circle.  It’s a variation of putting yourself in a position to be “voted off the island.”  For all concerned, a pre-arranged press-friendly party is best.  Please send a note to doug@oc-cuddle.com, and we can get this setup.

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Will there be reporters at the party?  That worries me.

Please read the article just above that talks about the conditions under which a reporter can attend a party.  If there will be a reporter at a party you are attending, you will either know all of the parameters well in advance (publication, whether or not there will be photography or video, etc.), or you will have an opportunity to have the reporter leave if advance notification wasn’t possible.  It will always be the reporter rather than the guest who is asked to leave in the event of a conflict.

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Do you offer private parties?  Our group is interested.

Sure.  We can facilitate a Cuddle Party at your location or ours for almost any size group.  Please write to Doug@oc-cuddle.com and let us know what you are thinking about. Rates will be quoted, but $300 to $500 is typical.

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Articles by REiD & Marcia, the Founders of Cuddle Party